Text Box: After learning of her poor condition, my first instinct was to put her down and end her suffering.  Dr. Kirby also agreed saying that she was in really bad shape and that she was suffering considerably.  My dilemma was that she was not in Collie Rescue’s program but rather in our care for her 8 day holding period as a foster home.  My hands were tied.  I can also be naïve and thought her owner may be looking for her and if I do put her down, they may eventually contact me and I will have to inform them that I no longer have her she had to be put to sleep.  Also, putting myself in their shoes I would know the devastation of not being able to see my beloved pet one more time and to say goodbye.  After explaining my situation, Dr. Kirby went ahead and gave her two injections to help with her breathing and to try to dispose of some of the fluid in her lungs.  In doing this, Dr. Kirby stated  “Barbara, I can’t promise you anything.  She is in really bad shape.”

Once home, I got her settled in, and then realized just how thin and matted she was and how wrong I was to give these people the benefit of the doubt to believe that her beloved family was truly looking for her.  Knowing now that she was indeed discarded the way she was, being old, blind and experiencing heart failure, I regretted then that I did not end her suffering when I had the opportunity.  I still had the problem of her being in the 8 day holding period as a foster home, so the idea of going back to Dr. Kirby and have her put down was out of the question.  Upset about everything I had just learned and pieced together as to what happened to her, I contacted the pound to let them know just how sick she was and I could not promise she would make it through the night or the following night.  Learning of this new information, the pound asked me to contact Dr. Kirby and have him fax them his findings so that they could include it with her paperwork in case she did pass on during the night.

It was time that she needed to relieve herself, so I picked her up very carefully and took her outside.  Supporting her with my hands under her hind quarters, she was able to go to the bathroom.  I carried her back inside and carefully placed her back down on her bedding.  After several trips of doing this and watching her for several hours from looking in on her, I had then made the decision to end her suffering.  My plan, call the pound first thing in the morning and tell them of the sad news in her passing away in the early morning hours.  I then called Dr. Kirby and let him know what I was prepared to do and  would he drop by the house in the morning to put her to sleep in my home where she seemed to be content knowing that she was in a home, safe, being cared for and made as comfortable as possible. Also, the surroundings were peaceful to her.  After all she had endured, I did not want to shuffle her back into the vet’s office and be put down in such a confusing and cold setting.  She deserved better.

Without having a name, I decided to call her Annie so that she would leave this place with the dignity of being identified once again with a proper name.  For the remainder of the evening, my husband and I gave her all the comfort we could and loved on her, telling her just how sweet and beautiful she was and how sorry we were that we could not be there for her sooner to end the misery of wandering the streets on her own to fend for herself while being blind, sick and scared.  We fed her probably the first decent meal she had in a long time, which took her awhile to eat, and once again I carried her outside to do her business.  After carefully placing her back on her bedding we sat there and stroke her head and back and to our amazement, she gave us a wonderful doggy smile and a faint glimmer came back into her eye.  Knowing that this strange woman who came to the pound to bail her out and drive her to the vet to get stuck with needles and off again to finally wind up in a warm place to feel safe and once again loved and cared for, Annie finally closed her eyes to rest for the night.

Annie, Page 2